The holidays are always looked forward to with excitement, anticipation and often a little dread. We know why we celebrate the holiday, but we are mere mortals and susceptible to the stresses and pressures of the season. We want to focus on the birth, life, ministry and Atonement of the Savior, but we yield to the customs and traditions of a material world. Recently, I have seen His image in the countenance of others who truly "get" the meaning of Christmas and the message that our Lord and Savior has shared with us.
For me, this is a particularly difficult Christmas. I find myself throwing one heck of a pity party! My children are all grown and off in other parts of the country. They have to make time for other members of their extended families or they are not in a position to travel. For whatever reason, I find myself alone for Christmas for the first time in my life and I am definitely feeling the impending loneliness. As if this were not enough of a reason to lick my wounds, I am experiencing one minor catastrophe after another and find my resources, patience and faith stretched thin. Just when things look most bleak, someone steps in and brings the perfect brightness of hope that exemplifies the teachings and example of the Savior.
There have been emmisaries of the Savior showing themselves through their actions and love that have demonstrated to me how He manifests Himself to us. I have had a very dear and cherished friend offer to fly me to be with family because he didn't want me to be alone through the holidays. I have had ward members and friends come to perform an act of service by trimming and pruning a large tree that has been making a nuisance of itself in my yard. When the alternator went out in my car and it became a matter of paying other bills or buying a new part for my car, my brother in law purchased the part AND traveled from another state to install it for me.
Our Father in Heaven truly loves each of us and because of this great love, He uses others to be His hands and His eyes and His loving arms. It is through others that His miracles are accomplished in our lives. When we reach out to help those around us and show kindness, love and mercy, we are allowing the Savior's image to show in our countenance.
As the recent recipient of so much love and generosity, I realize that I am never truly alone. My Savior is there with me every step of the way and wants nothing more than to lighten my burdens and share my joys. It is through the Christlike efforts of others that I am able to see this unfold in my day to day life.
As miraculous and wondrous as the miracles accomplished through others are, there is one gift from the Savior that comes only through Him and no matter how pure the intentions of those around us, it is only through Christ that the Atonement is available to us. Choices that have caused me to distance myself from the Savior, however briefly, can be overcome through humble application for forgiveness and a willingness to be obedient and follow His teachings. Does that mean that I will never falter again? No. I will fall, but I can get back up and repent and try again.
It's the process of perfection and the effort given to it that matters. We will not see perfection in mortality, but we can strive towards it every day. In the book "Continuous Atonement" by Brad Wilcox, he gives the analogy of the sacrament prayer. The prayer is an ordinance and therefore must be verbatim. When there is a mistake, the priest must start over again. There is no limit to the number of attempts that he can make until the delivery is perfect and when it is finally completed without error, the entire effort is counted as perfect.
This Christmas may be a little different for me with respect to how it is spent and with whom, but in many ways, it will be remembered as one in which a tremendous outpouring of love has been shown to me and an affirmation that I am NEVER alone. If I draw myself closer to Him, he will most certainly recieve me and draw closer to me.
Saturday, December 11, 2010
Thursday, June 24, 2010
When it touches close to home
For the last 22 years, my family has been close to the Linehans...so close in fact that my kids have grown up referring to them as aunt Kerri and uncle Ed. Their kids have grown up with my kids. My daughter lived with them through parts of college and would come "home" to their home on holidays and weekends. They are closer in some ways than my own family.
Two days ago, their son, Eddie, was in a severe car accident. He has been clinging to life for the last 48 hours with bleeding in the brain and rising inter-cranial pressure. My oldest daughter has spent many hours alongside Ed and Kerri as they grapple with this tragedy. It is as though it was one of her own siblings laying there.
We don't know what the outcome is for Eddie and the prognosis remains somewhat grim, but through this ordeal, my thoughts are drawn to the Gospel of Jesus Christ and the light and hope that is offered through his atoning sacrifice. It's easy for me to say because it isn't my baby in that bed, but I know that there is a plan for each of us and the Lord is looking after Eddie and will continue to do so.
I love you Eddie.....hang in there baby.
Two days ago, their son, Eddie, was in a severe car accident. He has been clinging to life for the last 48 hours with bleeding in the brain and rising inter-cranial pressure. My oldest daughter has spent many hours alongside Ed and Kerri as they grapple with this tragedy. It is as though it was one of her own siblings laying there.
We don't know what the outcome is for Eddie and the prognosis remains somewhat grim, but through this ordeal, my thoughts are drawn to the Gospel of Jesus Christ and the light and hope that is offered through his atoning sacrifice. It's easy for me to say because it isn't my baby in that bed, but I know that there is a plan for each of us and the Lord is looking after Eddie and will continue to do so.
I love you Eddie.....hang in there baby.
Sunday, April 4, 2010
Adversity
The events of recent weeks or even recent years seem to be showing a disturbing trend of escalation in scope and magnitude. We have seen natural disasters of biblical proportions. We have seen man's darkest, ugliest attributes. We are clearly building to something cataclysmic.
In Matthew 13:25, 29-30, we are given "The Parable of the Wheat and the Tares" which illustrates how both good and evil are sown together until the time of harvest where there will be separation and final reward. "after the gathering of the wheat, behold and lo, the tares are bound in bundles, and the field remaineth to be burned." The tares are allowed to sow alongside the wheat because to eliminate them would be to risk destroying the wheat as well......what does this analogy mean?
In all things, there is an opposite. I was sharing with a dear friend an example of how opposites combined to create a thing of beauty in a room that I had seen. The colors used were opposites on the color wheel, but when skillfully used together, the result was breathtaking. Opposites and opposition are necessary. We need darkness to appreciate the light. Through pain and suffering we achieve compassion and strength. I can list a multitude of examples, but the simple fact is that one cannot exist without the other.
On this Easter morn, I would admonish reflection on the life and ministry of Jesus Christ and while doing so, ask: "Am I wheat or am I tare?" Once you have come to terms with your place in the harvest........REAP!
D&C 4: 4
"For behold the field is white already to harvest; and lo, he that thrusteth in his sickle with his might, the same layeth up in store that he perisheth not, but bringeth salvation to his soul."
In Matthew 13:25, 29-30, we are given "The Parable of the Wheat and the Tares" which illustrates how both good and evil are sown together until the time of harvest where there will be separation and final reward. "after the gathering of the wheat, behold and lo, the tares are bound in bundles, and the field remaineth to be burned." The tares are allowed to sow alongside the wheat because to eliminate them would be to risk destroying the wheat as well......what does this analogy mean?
In all things, there is an opposite. I was sharing with a dear friend an example of how opposites combined to create a thing of beauty in a room that I had seen. The colors used were opposites on the color wheel, but when skillfully used together, the result was breathtaking. Opposites and opposition are necessary. We need darkness to appreciate the light. Through pain and suffering we achieve compassion and strength. I can list a multitude of examples, but the simple fact is that one cannot exist without the other.
On this Easter morn, I would admonish reflection on the life and ministry of Jesus Christ and while doing so, ask: "Am I wheat or am I tare?" Once you have come to terms with your place in the harvest........REAP!
D&C 4: 4
"For behold the field is white already to harvest; and lo, he that thrusteth in his sickle with his might, the same layeth up in store that he perisheth not, but bringeth salvation to his soul."
Saturday, April 3, 2010
Adventures in minor plumbing repairs
OK, for weeks now, I have listened to the constant drip, drip, drip of the toilet in the main bathroom. I could hear it while I was working (WITH MY NOISE FILTERING HEADSET ON), I could hear it when I was putting around in the kitchen, I could hear it when I was sorting laundry, I could hear it when I was freaking asleep for crying out loud! That sucker was driving me absolutely crazy!
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Every time anyone would flush, they would have to take the top off the tank, bend the float arm and cross their fingers and hope that the dripping would stop...if not, repeat the process.
This went on for a few weeks until one day, when I was adjusting the float arm, the stupid plastic screw....yes, I said plastic....good old American craftsmaship....popped and shattered into pieces, effectively ending the miserable life of that particular fill valve.
Enter repair kit number one. This is the part where I realize how deficient my tool kit is. The only tool required for a toilet repair job is a crescent wrench and guess what I DON'T have in my tool box...you guessed it, a crescent wrench. I'm trying to do this on a shoestring budget and said shoestring is about the size of a piece of vermicelli. After calling literally everyone in my phone book, I just gave up, shut off the water and said...OK folks, we're down to one toilet until I can obtain the necessary tools or until that miserably scrawny money tree begins to sprout! Great solution....while it lasted.
So I'm laying there, in the middle of a deep and restful sleep and I hear.....drip, drip, drip! I wake up in a cold sweat like I had been jolted from some horrible nightmare, only to realize that the fill valve in the toilet in the master bathroom has channeled the spirit of her dearly deceased sister fill valve in the main bath and is back to haunt me.
Enter repair kit number two AND a recently acquired crescent wrench. Do you know what you have to do to replace a tank kit? I do! Fun job! First, you turn off the water supply, then you flush the tank to empty it out and then you soak up the remaining water with a sponge. Once you have completed the aforementioned steps, you have to contort into an impossible position (no wonder plumbers have cracks....their bodies have split down the fault line!) just to get the wrench around the gasket under the tank.
Installing the replacement kit is an exercise in frustration too because some technical writer, in their infinite wisdom, assumed that the party/parties reading the "step by step, easy to follow instructions" would be teenagers with perfect eyesite. Hello?? Have you met any teenagers?? Not likely you will under the tank of a toilet either. Oh, and guess what? The replacement fill valve is 2 inches longer than the original and so the new float arm has to be bent into almost a right angle to keep the water from going over the top of the overflow tube.
OK, long story short (I know, too late already). After shelling out cash that I only pretended that I had, (sometimes you just have to overdraw.... or build an outhouse....because they will laugh you right out of the store if you try to pay with the money from your LIFE game....this I know) we (Ingrid, Joshua and I) managed to replace the the entire tank mechanism in both toilets.
Standing back and admiring our handywork and after a round of congratulatory high fives, we hear.....drip, drip, drip! I don't remember renting out a room to Stephen King for crying out loud! The repair job has now surpassed the original problem in magnitude, which often happens when you try to fix something and you have no clue whatsoever about the care and maintenance of that item.
Enter repair kits number three and four. Home Depot is my friend, Home Depot is my friend, Home Depot is my friend. Repeat this litany every four hours as needed and call me in the morning. Anyhoo, the nice man in the orange apron tells me that there is a better way....WAAAAAAAAAAW (by the way, that was the closest thing I could come up with to mimic a choir of angels singing from on high) and he shows me this nifty little one piece marvel that eliminates...OK, hold on to your hats for this one....the whole float ball/arm assembly ENTIRELY!!!!
Can you freaking believe it?? It's this little drum thingy (that is a technical term) that slides up and down on the shaft of the Fill valve and you can adjust it to your desired fill height and voile! No more ball! This little gem is easier to install, except for the contortionist routine and trust me, you ain't gettin' around that part baby, it works flawlessly, fills quietly and I haven't heard a single drip since......The End!
Now on to the leaky refrigerator!
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Every time anyone would flush, they would have to take the top off the tank, bend the float arm and cross their fingers and hope that the dripping would stop...if not, repeat the process.
This went on for a few weeks until one day, when I was adjusting the float arm, the stupid plastic screw....yes, I said plastic....good old American craftsmaship....popped and shattered into pieces, effectively ending the miserable life of that particular fill valve.
Enter repair kit number one. This is the part where I realize how deficient my tool kit is. The only tool required for a toilet repair job is a crescent wrench and guess what I DON'T have in my tool box...you guessed it, a crescent wrench. I'm trying to do this on a shoestring budget and said shoestring is about the size of a piece of vermicelli. After calling literally everyone in my phone book, I just gave up, shut off the water and said...OK folks, we're down to one toilet until I can obtain the necessary tools or until that miserably scrawny money tree begins to sprout! Great solution....while it lasted.
So I'm laying there, in the middle of a deep and restful sleep and I hear.....drip, drip, drip! I wake up in a cold sweat like I had been jolted from some horrible nightmare, only to realize that the fill valve in the toilet in the master bathroom has channeled the spirit of her dearly deceased sister fill valve in the main bath and is back to haunt me.
Enter repair kit number two AND a recently acquired crescent wrench. Do you know what you have to do to replace a tank kit? I do! Fun job! First, you turn off the water supply, then you flush the tank to empty it out and then you soak up the remaining water with a sponge. Once you have completed the aforementioned steps, you have to contort into an impossible position (no wonder plumbers have cracks....their bodies have split down the fault line!) just to get the wrench around the gasket under the tank.
Installing the replacement kit is an exercise in frustration too because some technical writer, in their infinite wisdom, assumed that the party/parties reading the "step by step, easy to follow instructions" would be teenagers with perfect eyesite. Hello?? Have you met any teenagers?? Not likely you will under the tank of a toilet either. Oh, and guess what? The replacement fill valve is 2 inches longer than the original and so the new float arm has to be bent into almost a right angle to keep the water from going over the top of the overflow tube.
OK, long story short (I know, too late already). After shelling out cash that I only pretended that I had, (sometimes you just have to overdraw.... or build an outhouse....because they will laugh you right out of the store if you try to pay with the money from your LIFE game....this I know) we (Ingrid, Joshua and I) managed to replace the the entire tank mechanism in both toilets.
Standing back and admiring our handywork and after a round of congratulatory high fives, we hear.....drip, drip, drip! I don't remember renting out a room to Stephen King for crying out loud! The repair job has now surpassed the original problem in magnitude, which often happens when you try to fix something and you have no clue whatsoever about the care and maintenance of that item.
Enter repair kits number three and four. Home Depot is my friend, Home Depot is my friend, Home Depot is my friend. Repeat this litany every four hours as needed and call me in the morning. Anyhoo, the nice man in the orange apron tells me that there is a better way....WAAAAAAAAAAW (by the way, that was the closest thing I could come up with to mimic a choir of angels singing from on high) and he shows me this nifty little one piece marvel that eliminates...OK, hold on to your hats for this one....the whole float ball/arm assembly ENTIRELY!!!!
Can you freaking believe it?? It's this little drum thingy (that is a technical term) that slides up and down on the shaft of the Fill valve and you can adjust it to your desired fill height and voile! No more ball! This little gem is easier to install, except for the contortionist routine and trust me, you ain't gettin' around that part baby, it works flawlessly, fills quietly and I haven't heard a single drip since......The End!
Now on to the leaky refrigerator!
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